I love it when God clearly moves in my life!
I have not blogged about a major event that has been happening in my life in the last 10 months. I feel that sometimes things are private and don't need to be blogged about :)
But I do want to share our triumph!
It all started a week and a half ago...
It was a Thursday evening and I was heading to my Bible, but felt that I should pick up my devotional instead. I was excited as I anticipated something from the Lord! And I was not disappointed!!
Years ago I was given a Joyce Meyer devotional and have inconsistently read it. But this evening the title was 'Stronger by Faith'. The following Bible passage accompanied this title...
The Lord is my Strength and my Song, and He has become my salvation; this is my God, and I will praise Him, my father's God, and I will exalt Him.
Exodus 15: 2
This passage and accompanying notes spoke volumes to me. You see for the past 10 months I have been separated from my husband. For the past two years I have been carrying fear, anxiety and anger. I have been disconnected from my husband and my faith has been heavily attacked. I never lost my faith in God but I was unstable in that area, as the enemy whispered lies to me - you're not good enough!! you're not saved...you've missed something!! As I was struggling with anxiety and fear this really rocked me!! I felt a wall between God and I, I was scared, but I carried on! These fears caused problems in my relationships with friends too as the enemy whispered...You're not good enough!! They all think you are immature and stupid!! They are so much more spiritually mature than you! They don't want to be your friend! You are too much of a burden!
For the past 10 months I have also been on anti-depressants for anxiety. And God was planning on moving in this too!! On Friday I met up with a friend that I hadn't seen for months! And when she began talking about spiritual things, I felt my sleeping spirit leap! I felt excited and joy. That evening I had dinner with her family and during this time God ministered to me through this wonderful lady. God let me know that he wanted me to learn who I am in him. He wanted to rebuild me! And this process started that evening!
My friend had recently worked through Spiritual gifts, love languages and the character that God had given us. That very evening she took me through these things and I learned who God made me! I am a Sanguine!! God has made me passionate, talkative and enthusiastic. But I have weaknesses too!! But they are areas to work with God on!! I realised that I don't need to apologise for how God has made me. He has made me for a purpose...for His purpose!
I discovered that my gifts are Faithfulness, Creative communication, craftmanship plus evangelist! I can see that! And it explains why that area of my life has been under attack! God let me know several years ago that my husband will come to him! It takes Faith to believe in His promise. It takes Faith to believe in Salvation. Our journey is a journey of Faith!
I also discovered that my husband and I share a love language! This shocked me but pleased me! We both love quality time! But I need to give him physical touch and he needs to learn to use words of affirmation!! Thankfully we have God to guide us!!
She also reminded me of God's view on marriage. She was encouraging and I learned a lot. She told me 'Let God wash Grace over it Anne!!' This is stopping me from taking on offences and rebuilding that wall!!
But this is not the end...it continues! I visited my friend at her church on Sunday and it was so obvious that I was meant to be there! I was afraid to go forward for prayer, so my friend took me! The Holy Spirit began to minister to me!! I had to let go of all my pain, anxiety, fear, anger, bitterness and grow in faith, lean on God and be filled with his Holy Spirit. As my friend prayed, as I prayed for these blockages to be removed (and stopped overthinking!!), God worked! He took all these blockages and freed me! He filled me and renewed me in His Spirit! And made it very clear that it was time to return to my husband, let Him be my strength and have faith that He will work! I am so thankful to God!! I am filled with joy! I am on Fire for our truly wonderful and great God! He is a healer and restorer, He is moving in my life to rebuild my faith, my marriage and my family!
On Monday evening I headed to my husbands. We talked about all that was happening. And my husband informed me that he believed in God, but wasn't a Christian because he wasn't baptised. I told him that is not true. Baptism is a public declaration of your commitment. I asked him if he would like to commit his life to God, and with his family all holding hands we all committed our lives to God :) I was so thrilled!! What a journey I was having.
On Wednesday I experienced something I haven't for about 2 - 3 years, God sent someone across my path and used my gift of evangelism. Standing in the middle of the fruit and vegetable aisle of our local organic shop, a lady approached me. I hadn't spoken to this lady for a long time! She asked how I was and then asked me how you heal a marriage in crisis!! I had one answer GOD!! I got to testify to her of God's work in my life, I got to talk to her about faith and the gospel, I talked to her about God. She was not a Christian, but for 30 minutes we stood there and discussed her beliefs in line with Christianity. God had a purpose for that meeting, I may never know what it was but I have faith that His will be done in her life!
God has given me lots of opportunities to share His amazing work in my life this past week and a half :)
On September 22nd I move into my husbands home. I move in knowing that there is a lot of work ahead of us but I also move in with the knowledge that God is leading us and He is our Strength!
We would appreciate your prayers in this as we continue to work with our God in our marriage.
Wow Anne, thanks for sharing such a personal story on here. It is really wonderful to read about what God has been doing in your life and to see your obvious excitement and joy at what is happening for you. I really understand what you mean about working with a difficult marriage and raising a difficult child as these are things I have to deal with also. I hope the move goes well!xxx
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